


If It Was Fate That Brought Me Here

by alexygalaxy



Series: Destiny's a Funny Thing (aka Vox Merlin) [1]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series), Merlin (TV)
Genre: Crossover, Gen, also if u care about swears i do swear in here a lot so., episode one if you will, this is mostly universe set-up tbh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:47:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27352963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alexygalaxy/pseuds/alexygalaxy
Summary: Vex & Vax are just looking for jobs in Camelot, nothing special, so of course they end up in an extremely convoluted series of chance events that get them the kind of jobs they'd never even think of having.
Relationships: Keyleth & Vax'ildan (Critical Role), Keyleth & Vex'ahlia (Critical Role), Percival "Percy" Fredrickstein Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo III & Keyleth, Vax'ildan & Vex'ahlia (Critical Role)
Series: Destiny's a Funny Thing (aka Vox Merlin) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1997629
Comments: 2
Kudos: 17





	If It Was Fate That Brought Me Here

**Author's Note:**

  * For [alwaysyourqueen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/alwaysyourqueen/gifts).



> here's to hyperfixations, our shitty 2014 merlin crossover fics, and katie mcgraths titties, all of which got me watching this show again and then dragging you into watching it with me and then adding you to the google doc where we spitballed the idea for this au until it became slapping. i hope you enjoy <3
> 
> so, without further ado, i bring you the origins of vox merlin!

Vax came to consciousness to the sound of birds chittering in the branches over his head. A chill crept up from the ground and through his spine, morning dew just beginning to soak his blanket and clothes. Sunlight was barely filtering through the leaves, casting the clearing in a misty green-ish tint that he’d call magical if he didn’t know what magic actually looked like.

Blast those fucking birds. He was sick of waking up to them. He said as much out loud. 

“Well, Vax,” Vex groaned, voice still thick with sleep, “Good news is we are going to a real, actual city, so you won’t  _ have _ to anymore.”

“Thank the gods,” he said, sitting up and beginning to fold his bedroll up. 

Vex mumbled something indiscernible and tugged her blanket back up over her shoulders, hoping for a precious few more seconds of sleep. They truly were  _ few _ , as almost immediately, Vax’s pillow came swinging at her face. 

“Get up, Stubby,” he called, kicking lightly at her knees to make sure she wouldn’t be comfortable enough to rest any more.

“What, are you afraid we’re gonna be late to the jobs we don’t have?”

He scoffed. “I just really don’t want to have to bed down in these fucking woods again.”

“We can already see Camelot, Vax. It’s barely a two hour walk. We’ll have a place to stay and work to pay for it before noon, even.”

“Oh, we will?”

“Yes, we will,” Vex said, sitting up and shoving her brother’s pillow back into his hands. “Because  _ I’ll _ be doing the talking.”

Vax snorted, walking back to his own space to finish collecting his half-packed bedroll. “Alright, alright. If you want a little help, just shoot me a look, and I’ll lend you a hand.”

He winked with the last word, and traced his hands through the air and focused his mind, eyes flashing the same gold as the trail of sparkles now drifting towards the forest floor.

“Vax!” Vex whisper-yelled. “Are you kidding me? You’re doing magic this close to Camelot?”

He motioned at the empty clearing around them. “Who’s gonna see? D’you think the birds will snitch to Raishan?”

Vex huffed. “They could. You don’t know.”

“I thought you liked them.”

“I think they’re pretty. I  _ also  _ think you ought to be a lot more careful with your magic, given that we’re walking into the heart of the magic ban.”

Vax rolled his eyes. “I am careful.”

Vex laughed.

“Here,” Vax said a few minutes later, as they began to head out of the clearing, fingers snatching at a low hanging branch. “If you like the damn birds so much, why don’t you wear this.”

He grabbed Vex’s shoulder to stop her walking so he could stick something behind her ear; a blue jay’s feather. It was a little wet, and the edges were mussed from where they’d gotten caught on the branch, but overall still beautiful. 

Vex ran her fingers along the feather to smooth it. “Thank you.”

“Brings out your eyes,” Vax called, already ten paces ahead of her down the path.

“Brings out your eyes too, then,” she said, jogging to catch up with him. “Which is why you should wear … this!”

She tugged at his shirt collar to get him in position to slip the second feather she’d found on the ground into his breast pocket. He yelped and plucked it away, twirling it between his fingertips for a moment before tucking it into Vex’s hair next to its match. 

“You hold onto it for me,” he said, suddenly much more somber. “That way, if anything happens, and we get split up, you’ll have something of mine, and you’ll know I’ve got to come back and find you.”

Vex frowned. “You really think they’re going to separate us?”

“It’s possible. We have … different skills.”

Vex reached for her brother’s hand, squeezing it tight. “I have spent the last eighteen insufferable years by your side, Vax, and if you think one move to a big city is going to stop me from staying there, no matter what kind of trouble you manage to land yourself in, you’re wrong.”

Vax patted his sister’s cheek softly. “I hope I am, Stubby.”

“Well,” Vex cleared her throat, “let’s get going, shall we? You were so anxious about time earlier.”

She started down the path, not letting go of Vax’s hand, tugging him alongside her as they headed towards the sunrise, and the unfamiliarity of a future in Camelot.

  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


They’d heard plenty about Camelot, between travelers passing through their hometown, letters from long-gone children of neighbors, and the occasional guard patrol wandering to the far outskirts of the kingdom’s territory. They knew it was a beautiful city, built to be as pretty as it was protective. They’d heard about the towering stone walls, and the tiered levels full of bustling streets that wound their way up to the palace in the peak of the city. They’d caught a glimpse or two as kids of the red and gold tunics that denote the city guard, and been granted the privilege to run their little hands along the hilt of one of the standard issue swords.

But despite all they’d heard and seen and touched, the experience of actually  _ being _ in Camelot was something they could never have prepared for. It seemed that each street corner they turned led to another road full with enough people to fill out their entire hamlet back home. It was so easy to get lost in the crowd, everyone but them seeming to have a place to be and knowing exactly how to get there. Every which way they turned, they were staring at the white stone walls and archways, towering over their heads, and the guards dotted along them with near inhuman consistency. Camelot was just … big. It was bigger than anything they’d ever seen, and it was starting to make Vax very, very small. 

If Vex felt similarly miniscule, she wasn’t showing it. She’d been marching up to food stalls and open shop doors all morning, inviting herself into conversations before the owner could say no, and inquiring if they knew of anyone ‘round these parts looking for an extra hand or two. She hadn’t had much luck as an outsider to the city, and the few times Vax had piped in to try and lend a helpful comment, he’d ended up pissing off the shopkeep. 

So, he had relegated himself to standing five feet or so away, kicking at the dirt, and smiling politely when Vex mentioned her brother was looking for work as well. Currently she was chatting with what looked to be a carpenter, trying to sell him on the idea of starting a delivery service. Vax was leaned against a pillar across the path, eyeing up the food cart next to him, whose owner was horribly distractible. Neither he or Vex had eaten yet, and this man wasn’t even attempting to keep an eye on the six loaves of bread he had sitting on the end of his table. Honestly, if one of the loaves found its way into Vax’s backpack, he really couldn’t be blamed. 

Just as he had shimmied the drawstring open, and had begun to reach his hand out, trying to gauge if his movement would draw the vendor’s eye, something whizzed past his head and sunk with a thud into the cart. He swore instinctively, whipping his head around to search for the source of the dagger. 

“Ha! Good shot!” someone called, and Vax’s eyes focused on a group about five men, all dressed in the crown’s red and wearing finely polished chain mail. Guards, then. 

“Was that really necessary?” Vax asked. 

“Oh, come on,” said the one in front, sleazy grin gleaming almost as bright as his pure white hair. “We’re just having a bit of fun here. We weren’t going to hurt anyone. We’re not murderers.”

“No, but you are jackasses.”

A smattering of chuckles broke out amongst the men, all cutting short as the white-haired one sent a glare down his nose. Bending closer to Vax, he all but sneered, “What did you just call me?”

“I called you a jackass, jackass,” Vax said, leaning back against the pillar with a deliberate casualness.

“I see,” the leader said, in a way that made it clear how dangerously thin his patience was. “You know, I’m feeling rather generous today, so I’m going to give you one more chance to amend that statement, since it’s possible that you didn’t realize who  _ exactly _ I am.”

He motioned at his tunic and garb as he spoke, making painfully sure that Vax knew he was speaking to no poor commoner.

“My apologies. I forgot that I was speaking to a pompous jackass.”

Before Vax’s grin could even reach half-cocked, the white-haired one was releasing another dagger, that buried itself in the pillar only inches from the side of his head. 

“Call me that again,” he warned, “and I won’t be as keen to miss your ear.”

He began to turn to the other guards, but froze as another knife whizzed past the tip of his nose, sinking into the wood on the other side of Vax’s head. 

“Threaten my brother again,” Vex said, hand still outstretched, “and I won’t be as keen to miss your  _ neck. _ ”

His gaze drifted in slow motion towards Vex, cheeks beginning to tinge red and jaw dropping slack. He opened and closed his mouth noiselessly at least twice before he managed to get a response out. 

“You’re under arrest.”

“You can’t do that!” Vax shouted, pushing off the pillar to make for Vex’s side. 

Before he could take two steps, his path was barred by two sharpened swords, and he could do nothing but watch as two other guards flanked Vex, each grabbing one of her upper arms in a manner far rougher than Vax appreciated. 

“I  _ can _ do that,” the leader addressed Vax, without making eye contact. “Because, as you are so clearly unaware, I happen to be the crown prince and sole heir to the throne of Camelot. Now, as I said before, I’m feeling generous today, so I’ll try and get her processed as a case of unintentional endangerment, rather than deliberate assault on the crown, those usually only end with banishment or jail time, not execution.” 

“You really are a jackass, prince or not, and I’m not letting you get away with this!” Vax shoved desperately at the flats of the blades across his path, failing to move them more than an inch.

“Would you like to join your sister in the cells? I was planning on just having you put in the stocks, but if you keep calling me names, I can assure you that there is a spot for you, on the exact opposite side of the dungeon as her.”

“Bitch, shithead, stupidass, heartless motherfucking cunt!” 

“Well, now you’re trying too hard.”

Vax kicked frustratedly at the shins of one of the guards, earning him a swift punch to the gut and a restraining of his arms by the other man on him. He grunted and tugged against the grip, to no avail.

“You threw the first knife, and now you’re arresting us for your own shitty joke gone wrong,” he yelled after the prince, who was already beginning to walk away and signal his guards to follow. “Some fucking king you’ll be.”

“He’s not wrong, Percy.” 

Every eye, including the prince’s, focused on the path behind them. A figure was standing about twenty feet back, a shock of red hair in a green cloak, arms crossed defiantly over a chest. 

“Keyleth, what are  _ you _ doing down here?” Percy asked, exasperated.

“I needed your input on something for the festival prep, and I figured I’d find you and your crew messing around down here. Though, I wasn’t expecting to find you … arresting innocents?”

“What else am I supposed to do? Let every person putting a price on my head just skip through the streets of Camelot right into the throne room?”

“No. But you could probably stand to let a few confused newcomers off easy.” 

She pushed past the guards holding Vax, tugging the daggers out of the pillar one by one. 

“Don’t give me that look, Percy,” she said, without looking back at Percy’s disgruntled frown. “If you’d listened literally at all, you might’ve overheard the girl asking about jobs. They’re new in town, is all. They weren’t trying to be disrespectful.”

“I kinda was,” Vax said.

“See!” Percy protested, pointing at Vax. “And it’s not just respect.  _ That  _ one,” he motioned towards Vex, “threw a knife at me! What kind of a message does it send if I just let her walk away? I have an image to uphold, you know.”

Keyleth cocked her head. “And that image is ... cruel and harsh and unforgiving?”

Percy groaned and buried his face in his hands. “You don’t  _ get _ it, I’m the  _ prince _ , and -”

“Look, Percy. If you can’t do it for princely honor or whatever, do it for me. I’ll consider this your favor owed for the last Harvest Festival.”

Percy’s face emerged from his hands, intrigued. “If I take you up on this, what do you suggest I have them do instead?”

“Well, we’re incredibly short-staffed for the feast at the moment. Perhaps they spend the week working to prove their loyalty to the crown instead of sitting in a musty old cell for show? I’ll even walk them to their posts, if you’re so worried about them threatening you.”

Percy considered for an excruciatingly long moment. “Fine. But I’m doing this entirely for you, Kiki. _ Don’t _ forget it.”

“I won’t,” Keyleth said, handing Percy his daggers back with smug cheerfulness.

“You heard her,” Percy called to the surrounding guards. “Let them go. The two of you go with the Lady, she’ll escort you back to the palace. Rest of you, with me.”

Percy gave one last look at Keyleth, shaking his head at her before turning and leading his squadron of guards further down the street. The second the last red tunic was out of sight, Keyleth’s demeanor made a complete 180. Her squared shoulders slumped comfortably and her primly set lips melted into a near-goofily wide smile. 

“Here’s your knife back,” she said, holding the blade out to Vex.

She took it, cautiously.

“That was a really good shot. Like, really impressive, you know? Like, wow. Where did you even learn to throw like that?” Keyleth looked almost bashful, faintest tinge of a blush  appearing as she rambled.

“I suppose I owe you some thanks,” Vex said, sidestepping Keyleth’s question, “for saving me from possible execution.”

“Oh, really, it’s no problem! You guys seem nice, and Percy’s also nice, even though he’s a dick sometimes. It wasn’t hard; I don’t think he really wanted to see you die, and  _ I _ definitely didn’t, so -”

“Thank you,” Vex said, mostly with the intention of preventing more word vomit.

“From me as well,” Vax piped up for the first time, bowing from the waist towards Keyleth. 

“You don’t have to bow,” she assured him, bending down awkwardly to try and meet his eyeline.

“You’re a Lady,” he said, still bowing.

“You shit-talked the prince, but you’ll bow to her?” Vex asked, eyebrow quirking knowingly.

“The prince was a dickhead. She’s not.”

“Speaking of Prince Dickhead,” Vex said, turning back to their new guest, “weren’t you supposed to have asked him about this banquet we’re now apparently employees of?”

“I - OH, yes, I was! Shit, uh, just wait here, I don’t want you guys to get lost trying to get to the castle, I’ll be right back, I swear!” 

Keyleth had already shuffled a ways backward down the street by the time she finished speaking, and was around the corner with her dress and cape swirling behind her in another moment. Faint calls of “Percy! PERCY!” echoed through the market air, washing over the twins as they stared at each other wondering what kind of lives this new city was bringing them.

  
  


* * *

Vax came to consciousness to the sound of chickens crowing through the window of his room. He tugged the blanket up towards his neck. They weren’t stopping. He groaned.

“You promised me I wouldn’t get woken up by fucking birds once we got to Camelot,” he mumbled at Vex, in her own bed on the opposite wall.

“And I thought I’d have a better job than stringing flower garlands for his royal highness, but it seems the future had surprises for both of us.”

Vax heard a distinctive rustling noise from across the room, and then his eyes flashed yellow, halting the pillow in mid-air only inches from his head. He reached out, grabbed it, and pulled it over his head to try and drown out the chickens.

“Vax!” came Vex’s more-muffled voice, “One, that’s cheating. Two, stop fucking doing that!”

“Doing what?”

“You know damn well what, and I’m not going to  _ say  _ it out loud, because if your new employer found out, you’d be burnt at the stake in the town square.”

“He won’t find out, Stubby. Quit worrying.”

“Just promise me you’re not going to use it at work?”

“I won’t use it all that much.”

“VAX!”

“Fine, I won’t use it all. I’ll polish every single plate by hand even if my fingers get raw and fall off. Happy?”

“Yes. And give me my pillow back,” Vex said, pulling it away from her brother’s head, “we need to get up anyways. I’ve got a little breakfast for us to eat before we go. Keyleth handed it to me as I was leaving last night. She said the kitchens had extra, but I think she just took it for us.”

She reached into her pack and pulled out a cloth-wrapped parcel. Inside was a small loaf of bread, along with some apples and cheese. She tore the loaf in half and tossed Vax his share.

“She seems to really like you,” Vax said through a mouthful of bread.

Vex shrugged. “She seems starved for a friend. I don’t blame her. If the only person I had to hang out with all day was Prince Jackass, I’d be just as weird as her.”

Vax raised his bread for a toast. “I’ll second that.” 

They finished eating in silence, the only thing worth talking about being their newfound “employment”, and neither of them wanting to think about that more than they had to. The sunlight began to stream more heavily through the window, warning them that their presence would soon be needed at the castle. Vex repackaged the remaining apples and slipped the parcel under her bed for safekeeping. 

“Well, let’s get this day over with shall we?” she said, heading for the door, thoroughly unenthused.

“After you.”

  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


Vax’s feet fucking hurt. 

He sighed and rocked ever so slightly forward on his toes, since that was as much shifting around as he could do without causing a scene. He and the other servants were lining the sides of this room, waiting for one of the nobles at the dining room to make eye contact with them for some inane request. 

Refill my wine glass for the fourth time, get me a napkin because I don’t close my mouth while I chew, move the grapes 3 inches closer to my hand. Gods. Vax knew he came from a humble life, but this was decadent dependency to a degree he could barely comprehend. 

And to make things worse, he couldn’t even make snide remarks to Vex about it, because she was on the opposite side of the banquet hall. They’d separated the men and the women to look more proper, because the visiting king who was supposed to sign some treaty and give away some land or men or something was one of the most antiquated, sexist men Vax had ever had the displeasure of being in a room with, and Camelot really wanted to impress him. The one pro of being separated from his sister, though, was that she couldn’t comment on his clothes. 

All the servants were in extremely musty ceremonial robes. The women’s outfits were in the red and gold of the De Rolo house, with a fitted corset and egregious amounts of embroidery along the skirt and sleeves. But, they were still overall functional as dresses. 

Vax had a tunic and pants, fine, and a vest, also fine. And he had a hat, horrific. It was a square little thing, adorned with an entirely oversized plume of feathers and metal baubles. He  _ jangled _ . 

Despite his best efforts, Vax was pretty sure a disgusted frown had begun to creep over his face, and in fate’s cruelest twist of the knife yet, Percival chose that moment to make direct eye contact with him. He grinned smugly from his cushy little chair at the head table, and curled his fingers in a distinctive “come here” motion. Vax stood still for a few seconds just to make sure Percival knew Vax still thought he was a jackass.

“Yes, your highness, what can I do for you?” Vax asked, hands tucked politely behind his back as he approached Percival’s side. 

“D’you see that wine pitcher?” Percival asked, motioning vaguely with his hand towards the table. He was sitting very slouched in his chair, restricting the movement of his arms, but seemingly couldn’t be bothered to correct it for ease of direction. Thankfully there was only one pitcher nearby.

“Yes, I do. Would you like me to pour you some more, sire?”

“I would love that, Vax, but unfortunately, it is  _ empty. _ You seemed to be just aching to give your legs a little stretch earlier, and I was wondering if you’d be so kind as to run to the kitchens and fill it back up for me? I have a very specific blend I like, ask the cook for it.”

Vax grinned, hoping his teeth conveyed pure malice, and reached for the jug. “Certainly. Anything else?”

“No, that’s all,” Percival said, craning his head around the back of the chair to get a glimpse at Vax. He stretched a finger out and tweaked one of the baubles on the hat so it tinkled. “Hurry back!”

Vax gave a slight bow before turning on his heel and absolutely booking it for the doors. Just as he reached them, the shrill ringing of a spoon against a goblet filled the room. Raishan had called for order, and had stood in her chair to introduce some woman in a long green dress. 

Vax hadn’t bothered to listen to the words coming out of the queen’s mouth, but it became apparent that the lady in green was hired entertainment. The last glimpses that he caught as the door slipped shut were her beginning to walk around the room and sing. Just as well that he was out of there, he thought. He’d never been much of a fan of acapella, and hearing it all fancy and trussed up like the rest of the evening would’ve made it grate even worse.

That was part of the problem, that Vax was stubborn enough to hate everything about working in the palace on pure principle. He didn’t think he deserved to be here, he didn’t think Vex deserved to be here either. They really hadn’t done anything wrong besides stand up for themselves against a stranger who was being a shithead, but by nature of his shitheadedness being royal, he was automatically in the right. 

Besides that, the hours here were long, which he didn’t particularly mind. They were also dreary and repetitive, which he really did. Vax got antsy quite easily. He liked to move around and do new things, to poke his fingers into all the dark corners and see if they had anything hidden in them. There weren’t many dark corners to be found in polishing plates and armor, or washing tabards, or carrying jugs of wine around because the prince can’t possibly drink anything other than his special-boy blend. 

There was also the subject of his magic. Being in Camelot alone was bad enough - far more people with wandering eyes, most of whom didn’t have the kind of personal attachment to him that would facilitate a bribe for secrecy like members of his tiny hometown. But to work in the castle, in the heart of the hatred that would see him dead, to spend his hours doing thankless tasks for men and women he was sure would burn him alive without a second thought if he made one wrong move? It was a particularly awful feeling. The kind that lingered in the air at the nape of your neck and sent chills running down your spine every so often, just to make sure you didn’t forget about it. 

Vax shivered. 

Vex, he thought, shaking his head to recenter himself, trying to ignore the stupid jangling his hat did. He’s here for Vex, who currently walks free through the city rather than being locked in a jail cell, because they’re doing this work. Because Lady Keyleth made a bargain, and Prince Percival seemed to actually listen to her.

Vax couldn’t help but smile at the thought of the Lady. A good portion of it was the memory of the look on the prince’s face when she brought up some old bet of theirs. He respected a good bit of blackmail when he saw it. But she was also just … nice, it seemed. She’d given Vex “spare” food for breakfast at least three times in the week they’d been here. She liked to wander the castle during the day, and she’d always give Vax a wave and a little smile if she passed him by. (He’d always give her a bow back, if only to see a bit of sheepish blush creep across her cheeks.)

But no matter how genuinely kind or friendly or innocent she seemed, she was still the crown’s ward. She was still royalty, and she was still pledged in heart and action to Queen-Incumbent Raishan. She was still beholden to the law, and the magic ban, and would turn Vax in to be executed the same as anyone else in this palace would. He couldn’t afford  _ not _ to assume that about her.

He reached the door to the kitchen just about then, pushing it open gingerly to find it still bustling with cooks putting the finishing touches on dessert. At least five heads whipped around to stare at him, mild panic in their eyes. He held up the pitcher and before he could finish saying “Percival asked me”, a nice looking girl with flour on her shirt was leading him to the cellar where they kept the wine, and cracking the tap for the right barrel. 

She filled the pitcher for him, and handed it back with a knowing smile. Vax bowed to her too, because, he decided, that was what he did for women who made fun of the crown prince.

He slipped back out of the kitchens then, wishing them wordless luck on their frantic meal prep, and began carrying Crown Prince Percival’s Special Wine back to the dining hall. And, it seems the natural follow-up to carrying Crown Prince Percival’s Special Wine, was thinking about Crown Prince Percival.

Obviously, he was a prat. That much was apparent from every interaction Vax had had with him thus far. Although, in his defense, if Vax had to sit next to some of those nobles and seem polite all night, he’d probably also want alcohol to get him through it. And, also in Percival’s defense - Vax surprised himself by having a second point - he  _ had _ actually backed down with surprising ease when Keyleth had asked him not to punish him and Vex. He at least didn’t have a cruel streak. 

If anything, Vax would chalk him up to having far too much dedication to his public image. Which, he supposed, made sense for a prince. Keyleth at least seemed to believe that Percival had a good heart, and Vax was willing to believe that  _ she _ had a good heart, so by extension Percival probably also did, somewhere in there. 

That absolutely didn’t mean that Vax forgave him for throwing a knife at him, or for threatening to arrest his sister, or for putting him in this godforsaken outfit, or for whatever stupid request he was going to have for Vax in about twenty minutes, once he’d just had time to get comfortable on the side of the room. 

Vax was staring down the banquet hall doors at this point. As he neared the door, he slowed. Something was off. He’d only been gone for maybe ten minutes, and he didn’t know  _ much _ about opera performances in royal banquet halls, but he figured they probably lasted longer than that. He wasn’t hearing any singing. 

Actually, he wasn’t hearing  _ anything _ . No din of conversation, no clinking of silverware, no footsteps of servants rushing about between guests. Cracking the door open the slightest amount possible, he pressed his eye to the slit and peeked inside. 

He was met with the sight of the entire party frozen in time. Forks lifted halfway to mouths, glasses outstretched mid toast, hands clasped in applause. It was like a perfect tableau of a banquet, save for the fact that every guest had their gaze fixed on the woman in green, faces stuck in varying levels of terror. 

The woman in green was the only figure moving freely through the room. She was still singing, but much quieter and much less daintily. The words were not English, but those of the Old Religion, and the golden sheen Vax caught in her eyes was unmistakable. She was a witch, and she’d caught the entire hall in some kind of paralysis spell. 

That alone wasn’t great, but she was also brandishing a steak knife in one hand as she cast. Her eyes were fixed on Percival and she was walking the length of one of the tables directly towards him. Vax couldn’t mistake the murderous intent in the air.

His mind was racing, doubling in speed with every step she took towards the prince. He was going to do something about it, he’d already made up his mind about that. The problem was that he couldn’t use his own magic to combat the sorceress, given that he’d probably be burned at the stake along with her the second the fight was over. He also didn’t have any of his normal throwing knives on him, due to being in uniform, and she was getting dangerously close to Percival. 

Vax looked down at the wine he was still carrying in his hands. 

“Sorry, Percival,” he muttered. 

He shouldered open the door and chucked the pitcher as hard as he could at the witch’s head. 

She practically hissed as she spun on her heel to face her attacker. She drew her hand through the air, sending the pitcher careening off-course. Vax took that brief moment of distraction to gain ground on her, sprinting towards the center of the dining hall. Grabbing a few knives off the banquet table as he ran by, he situated himself across from the witch with the table between them for a slight bit of cover. 

She cocked her head curiously at him, not stopping her chanting or her slow crawl towards the prince’s paralyzed body as she stared him down. 

He threw one of the knives, aiming for her chest, but she held up a hand to stop it in midair. With a flick of her wrist and a golden shine in her eye, chanting still unbroken, she spun the knife about and launched it back towards him. He prayed no one noticed the flash of yellow that crossed  _ his _ eyes as well as he dodged the blade with unnatural swiftness. 

He sent his hand forward again, aiming for the other side of her face this time. He watched as her gaze drifted to the right to track the movement, and then froze for half a second in confusion, finding none. 

By the time she’d registered the feint, Vax was already sliding across the table and stabbing between her ribs.

The chanting stopped. She stared up at him, eyes wide and mouth gasping, hands pressed unbelieving around the wound. Vax almost pitied her, since he had no more knives on hand to end this quickly. 

She began to growl, words thick with anger and blood gurgling up her throat, hands twisting as she began to cast something vengeful. 

Vax barely had a chance to stagger a few steps backwards before something burst through her sternum and she doubled over, limp. In the space where her form once was stood a very unfrozen Queen Raishan, blade in hand. 

Vax cleared his throat. “Thank you.”

Raishan pulled her sword loose from the witches back, wiped it clean on the tablecloth, and sheathed it before addressing Vax. “I owe you thanks as well. Were it not for your dedication, her enchantment might never have faltered.”

“She was going for the Prince,” Vax said as a vague form of explanation.

“She was going for me,” Percy stuttered from Vax’s right, apparently also loosed from paralysis. He kept patting at his chest, an almost offended look on his face, as if he couldn’t believe someone would really want to put a steak knife through it.

“Indeed she was,” Raishan said, calmness set eerily against the tense buzz that was beginning to spread through the room as guests returned to themselves. “But she did not manage to complete her wicked act. You’ve done a great deed in preventing the plague of sorcery upon our kingdom.”

Vax managed to give a polite nod, but nothing else.

“A reward is in order,” she continued, “for such a service to the crown. A permanent post in the royal halls seems fitting for one so dedicated to our cause. Effective immediately, you are to serve as the Prince’s personal aid.”

Vax’s jaw dropped momentarily, matching the look of apprehension that had also stretched across Percival’s face. 

“I - Of course, I -” Vax stuttered, walking a fine line between personal horror and not offending the queen incumbent. “I’m not doing it without my sister.”

The words were out of Vax’s mouth before he could process them, slipping out like second nature in a moment of uncertainty. Upon hearing himself talk, he realized he didn’t know where Vex was and immediately began searching the crowd for her. He laid eyes on her in just a few moments, as she had shoved her way unceremoniously between two guests at the table to get close enough to examine Vax for any sign of injury. 

“I see,” Raishan said, eyebrow twitching with amusement. “I’m unsure of what open positions we might have available, so -”

“I can take her!” Keyleth jutted in, raising her hand meekly off the table. “I mean, Gwen’s baby is due any week now, she was planning to take off soon anyways, and I really think she should’ve stopped working already, I mean, it’s got to be so hard to walk around as pregnant as she is. But, uh. I could use a full-time lady in waiting. And I already like Vex’ahlia. If you don’t mind.”

“But of course, Lady Keyleth. Your desire is my command. Then it’s settled. You, uh?”

“Vax’ildan.”

“You, Vax’ildan, will report first thing tomorrow as servant to the prince, and Vex’ahlia will report as servant to my ward. Now,” she clapped her hands, sending a hush over the murmurs that had begun to spread throughout the room. “Let us remove this body, and then perhaps we shall retire for the evening. We’ve all had our fair share of entertainment, I would say.”

The second she finished speaking, bustle filled the room, as guests began to stand up to return to their quarters and servants rushed to clear the table as well as the corpse still pooling blood onto the floor. Vax stood still, trying to catch his mind up with the world around him. He felt Vex walk up beside him, and he reached out a hand for her shoulder. 

"You're alright?" he asked.

"I'm perfectly fine," she said, encasing his hand in her own. "And you're incredibly brave and stupid. Thank you." 

He just gripped her shoulder tighter.

“Well, Stubby," he said eventually. "We got jobs.”

“We did.”

“How the fuck am I going to do this?” Vax asked, staring distantly at Percival, who had wandered over to the wine pitcher and was staring at it, empty on the floor, with shocked grief.

“It won't be too hard,” Vex answered, patting his hand. "He may be a prick, but you're very …  _ charming. _ " 

With that, she reached out a hand to tweak one of the little bells on the stupid hat Vax had almost forgotten he was wearing. 

He shoved her shoulder away in mock disgust, smile breaking his face as she laughed. She stretched out a foot to kick his shin, which he jumped to avoid. He grabbed the hat off his head to throw at her, but was stopped by the sound of a pointed cough.

Raishan was standing off to their side, saying nothing, but motioning down at the corpse they were still very much standing over. 

Vax put the hat back on, and stared at the floor until Raishan turned away.

"So it begins, Stubby."

"So it begins."

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much for reading i hope you liked it!! if you're so inclined, please leave kudos or a comment, and you're also always welcome to come yell at me about this au, or merlin, or vox machina at my tumblr [cadykeus-clay](https://cadykeus-clay.tumblr.com)!!


End file.
